Art by Janis Dehler
Something is a bit different today and maybe you will indulge me, reader, as I look back at this year, the last 8 months really; a time of shifted perspective, inner life, outward expression. A bag of change that asks something of me. A downward motion while being lifted higher into conscious awareness. I was reminded recently how once seen we cannot go back. So, let’s look out this new window, buffed and polished, ready for more light.
The year began with the completion of a decision to put out a book of my art and poetry that coincided with two dynamic solo shows. Courage and vulnerability rose within me touched by grace to move forward. To lay before others what rumbles inside. What I received in return is the gift of hearing another’s story, their pain, new awareness, and hope. What I bring forward in memory are the deep conversations regarding what touched viewers in both the visual language and written poems. Hearts expressing tears, laughter, and curiosity.
In April, I began a 14-week intensive program focused on art but also on life. For, after all, one is the other constantly being created, learning skills, balancing darks and lights, letting go, not falling in love too quickly, leaning into discernment. Taking color and making a new color. Trusting intuition. Living in flow and feeling the breath of joy in a completion.
I said yes to a request to preach on a Sunday in July. I chose ‘a pure heart’ as the core of my thoughts while juxtaposing Judaic Christian teachings with the 25th verse of the Tao Te Ching. Going to depths within over weeks of preparation. Embodying teachings, rememberings, taking it to the bones.
In August, I felt completion. Time for fun and relaxation. I began the intermittent trend of posting a blog when I had one. I embraced the tiredness that wove through me and honored it.
Then, I read The Breath Beneath Matter by Ethan Solace and my world cracked open again. Images formed as I read, and underlined, read again to understand. I felt lifted, carried, as the beauty of his imaginings felt true within me. It was not long before I realized a new series was and is forming expressing the beauty of Ethan’s premise in paint. As of yet, I have not found my own words.
For my series and book, One World, the words and poetry were inspired by quotes I had savored over time. For my series and book, Unfolding the Heart, the words and poetry came simultaneously or one after the other. Now, for this series, Breath and Matter, I have images and no words. I trust they will arrive. When, I do not know.
Sometimes, I fear this emptiness. Other times, I remind myself that all is well. They will come when ready. And truly, it is not emptiness I feel but the expectation that they be there. There is no there. It is here and still forming. Rich in image. At times floundering in concepts waiting to be understood.
If you are still here with me, thank you for listening. Peace of heart to you in your own journey of perspective, of seeing the world with new eyes and heart.
Blessings,
Janis