GREETINGS,
I hope this finds you well in this fast moving time. I write today to give you the story of the ups and downs of my book publishing journey.
The process of compiling poems and art for a book started out like the 8-year-old me riding my bike downhill, enjoying the breeze in my hair, feeling like I could even let go of the handlebars and stretch out my arms; suddenly, I find I am going uphill— then up some more. Will this never end? I panicked last week, and a few tears fell with a stranger, on the other end of an email, who was simply trying to design and format my book, as I began to second guess my book printing decisions.
But first, back to the beginning: Digging through my poems and deciding which of my beauties are good enough to go into a book was fun, but it also brought a great deal of loud noise into my head—screaming all the should and should not’s that want to sabotage any new idea. I made my way around the noise and started to put my gems in order, initiated revisions, and cleaned up punctuation. I researched heavily, how to publish a book, and decided to hire an editor— the all-time best decision I made for this project. I chose her for a variety of reasons, but being a former English teacher moved her right up to the top of the list.
Her name is Sage. She took the entire manuscript, sharpened her metaphorical red pencil, and went to work leaving bold marks in the tiniest of spaces. As I was now biking back up hill, I cried out, “I don’t even know how to write a sentence.” You might have thought I would slink out of class with a D, but I didn’t; it turned out to be a fun and educating process. I enjoyed my writing buddy for a couple of weeks as our emails flew back and forth with laughter, encouragement, and suggestions. Then, dusting off her hands, Sage was done; she cleaned out her desk and went home—as she should; I was left on my own to step forward and figure it out.
Then I found Dave (the one on the other end of my email breakdown and my equally best decision) to help me create the cover and design the interior. I rode downhill again as he took my ideas, arranged them, and artfully brought all the elements together with his own flair. The cover, back, and spine were born, and I delighted in them.
Now we are uphill again, maybe the steepest so far, with me feeling, in various moments, like I will not reach the summit. “Whose great idea was it to write a book?” “I made a mistake.” “This is more than I can handle.” “I don’t know what I am doing.” This last one being the most trueful statement. Every little task is monumental in my beginner’s mind. I can’t say I am going downhill yet, but I keep taking in information that will inform me as to when I am ready; and, for a bit, I might just ride on flat terrain.
I know I have more hills to climb but I will write of them another time. For now, I feel grateful for the journey—even as hard as it, at times, presents itself. Even through all the losses and the changes this year has brought us, I find momentum.
Keep your pen handy!
Janis